


Keep Trying

by starmelee



Category: Hades (Video Game 2018)
Genre: Brief mentions of Depression, Flirting, Hades's A+ Parenting, M/M, Pining, There are a few brief mentions of other characters, Zag is a sad boy and i wanna see more of it, but yeah I just wanted to work on something cute, pining Zagreus, this will probably be a oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-29
Updated: 2020-04-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:53:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23917849
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starmelee/pseuds/starmelee
Summary: Zagreus has been trying to get Thanatos to understand what he's been trying to say, but Death Incarnate is rather stubborn when it comes to blocking messages.
Relationships: Thanatos/Zagreus (Hades Video Game)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 315





	Keep Trying

**Author's Note:**

> A few things:  
> This is basically unbeta'd, so whatever editing has been done is my own, but I've been circling around posting this for about 4 months so I figured it was time.  
> I live for angst so I briefly punched in a hc of mine regarding the Pool of Styx, see if you can find it ;3  
> And finally, thanks for reading my work! I look forward to seeing what you guys think!
> 
> (PS, Zag is a bicon)

Hearing the two of them sing together was like a sacred experience. Zagreus watched Eurydice and Orpheus, each with their eyes closed, serenade the mess hall with her song… their song now, he supposed. Zag hadn’t dared to take a seat, but he did observe from the opening built into the entrance hallway, a smile on his face. It appeared as though everything between them would be healed, even if it would take time, but a duet certainly meant a step forward. 

“You didn't have to do this for them,” Than’s voice muttered behind him, and Zag turned to greet him with a small smile. 

“I think I did. It would be a crime for them to remain apart when they so clearly longed for each other. You could feel Orpheus’s pain, and while Eurydice’s own was less palpable, I could still tell she was hurting. It’s nice to see them together.”

Thanatos made a noncommittal noise as he observed the performance, though Zagreus could see a hint of a smile on his companion’s face anyway. “I suppose you’re right. But your empathy may end up being your undoing, one day. Be careful with yourself.”

Zag chuckled. “Of course, Than. I just saw an opportunity to help and took it. Feeling as though your love is unrequited is… hard. But as an outsider, being able to connect the threads between them made me feel good about myself.” 

He could tell that he’d just piqued Than’s interest, so he opted to head for his room. “Regardless, Stygius requires my attention. I trust that I’ll see you around?” 

Than’s mouth opened like he wanted to say something, but it closed as he nodded. “Of course, Zagreus.” His companion smiled, and something in Zag’s chest warmed. He needed to get out.

Instead of walking through the room, he walked around, avoiding the tick of his father’s eyelid as he passed, a clear indication of his annoyance as well as his control over his anger. Ever since Zagreus had beaten him with Varatha, he’d reacted like that; something that the prince suspected had to do with his attachment to the weapon in earlier times. Still, he carried on past his father and entered his room after waving hello to Nyx, staring at his bed for perhaps a little too long before exiting his room to the courtyard. Skelley was there, as usual, with a few words. Naturally, when he noticed the prince breeze by and go towards the outlook, he ceased his rapid-fire chatter and let him have his moment. 

Looking out over Tartarus, Zag felt himself frown. He’d made it through so many times-- gotten so much done! Yet… yet there would always be another death. Another awakening in the pool and a walk of shame back to his room. His father was waiting for him to give up, he could feel it, but he wasn’t ready to quit yet. Despite this determination, Zagreus felt himself wilt. Sometimes doing whatever it took was too much for him to handle on his own. He wished he had someone who would talk to him, no strings attached. Achilles was sweet, but Zagreus had started avoiding him ever since he claimed he had nothing left to teach. It was obvious that his puppy crush and Patroclus’s involvement in his escapades had distanced the two of them. 

He wished there was more he could do. For them. For Achilles. 

He sighed, taking a seat on the ledge and just thinking. Thinking about his childhood, running the halls with or on Cerberus, laughing out war cries and buried in fur. He thought about Achilles; the shade’s kind and warm demeanor reaching Zagreus during his toughest moments— teaching him to control his passion and his anger and to focus it. He thought about the injuries that were healed and the time he spent with Than as he grew older, Death Incarnate having been sweet enough to sit down with Zag when his father wouldn’t and update him about the ongoings of the underworld. 

He shifted when he grew uncomfortable, crossing his legs and continuing to think. He could remember Hypnos cracking jokes at him when he was angry to lighten his mood (and more often than not, it worked). He remembered Meg sparring with him and then bringing dinner into his room as an apology for totally kicking his ass. There were so many good memories. 

Something happened, after that, that made the days dull and ruined the tune of his heart, as Orpheus once said. Suddenly rooms were emptier, colors greyer, and his energy wore thin. He slept for a month, unable to wake up or recover. An emptiness filled him as his head was filled with all kinds of things. It was especially bad when his father became involved, his words causing more harm than Zag ordinarily would have let them. Each insult made his heart break more, and he’d buried himself under blankets until a certain visitor finally managed to catch him in one of those rare moments where he was awake and able to listen. 

_  
“Zagreus,” a voice whispered to him from somewhere in the darkness. “I know you’re awake. May I come in?”_

_“I suppose,” Zag muttered from beneath his pillow, though it was muffled underneath all of the fluff._

_“You can’t stay here forever,” Than advised softly, just as Zagreus felt the space just under his right hip dip downward. “I know that it’s hard right now, but you need to face the world eventually.”_

_“I think Father would much rather I remain behind closed doors, somewhere that I can’t disappoint him further. Or at least, disappoint him within looking distance.”_

_Thanatos hummed next to him, and there was more pressure on Zag’s face than that of just the pillow. “Yes, but also consider that there are many more people who want to see you than there are people who don’t. Myself, Achilles, Dusa, Megara, Hypnos, Nyx… we all want to see you out and about. You can talk to me about these things, you know. Or Achilles, or whomever you wish to seek comfort from. We are all here for you.”_

_The pillow was slowly pulled from his loose grip and off of his face, though his eyes were still closed. “I feel like there’s something no one is telling me. Something that I don’t know. It’s… I feel insane sometimes, cooped up here. Than I… I don’t feel like I belong here, and He certainly doesn’t help.”_

_He could practically feel Thanatos’s frown. “You were born here, Zag, your family and friends are here. I’m not sure where your sense of displacement comes from, but I will attempt to make you feel more welcome. This is your home, after all.”_

_“Isn’t it yours, as well,” he inquired, turning his head slightly and peaking open his green eye to peer at Than. A bonus to being of Night Incarnate, you could see in the dark. He couldn’t see perfectly like the others, however._

_“Of course. But more often than not, I’m on the surface, doing my job for your father. Plus, I have no need for rest like you do, and I hardly need to eat or drink. I just… exist here when I’m not too busy to stop in.”_

_“Oh,” Zag whispered, not quite knowing what to say._

_“I’ll be back in with food. You must be starving after your slumber,” Than made to stand up and go, but Zag’s hand shot out and snatched his._

_“Wait-” he almost cringed at how desperate he sounded. “Please just. Stay? Just for a little while?”_

_Thanatos seemed to mull it over before he nodded, awkwardly sitting back on the bed. “Whatever you need of me.”_

_“Well don’t be so awkward,” Zagreus muttered, moving over and patting the spot next to him. “Lay with me, Than.” There was a paise. “Wait-” he felt the heat rising in his cheeks. “Not like that! You totally don’t have to if you don’t want to it was just an innocent suggestion I swear-”_

_Thanatos’s laughter cut him off as the bed shifted and he laid beside him. “I understood what you meant, Zagreus. It’s fine.”_

After that, Than had somehow convinced him to get up and eat something, actually leaving his room for the first time in what had been just under two months. Zagreus hadn’t been back in bed since, though it had been just before his discovery of his heritage and the beginning of his quest to escape. Than had lied to him, but it hadn’t been his secret to tell, so he’d let it slide in the best interest of repairing their relationship. 

Still, the innate emptiness he carried remained; though, it grew better when he helped people. That was why he liked it so much, he figured. Because it made the ache hurt a little less. Memories echoed in his head like that for a little while, both happy and sad. Vestiges of what once was circulated in his thoughts, almost as if he was chasing ghosts. Hah. Ghosts. 

After a little while, he clambered to a stand and summoned Stygius to his hand. “It’s you and me, Stygie. Let’s prove Father wrong.” 

He marched past Skelly and approached his window, ignoring the conditions of The Pact in his own best interests. This would be a skill run, not one for fun. His descent was swift, the sound of his father’s voice nowhere near him as he approached the glowing blue orb before him. 

He would make it this time. 

-

Than didn't turn to look at him, but he did acknowledge Zagerus’s presence with a soft ‘hello,’ and a half-step to the side to make room for the Underworld Prince. 

“Than, I brought this for you,” Zagreus passed him one of the bottles of Ambrosia he’d received for beating Bull-Fucker Theseus and the aforementioned Bull.

“Zagreus—'' Thanatos stopped short as he stared at the bottle being offered to him. His gaze suddenly connected with Zagreus’s, and there must have been something in his expression that Than was looking for because he simply took the bottle and tucked it away. “I don’t know why you would- it doesn’t matter. There is something I would also like to give you.” 

Before Zagreus could reject the gift, something small and soft was being pushed into his hands. “I insist you take him. Mort needs someone who can properly take care of him. And who knows, maybe he can take care of you. I ah, I have to go now. To work. But thank you, Zagreus.” 

In a flash of green, Zagreus was alone again, a soft rose color to his cheeks as he stared at Than’s most prized possession in his hands. Mort carried lots of memories, as well. Happier ones, simpler ones. He wondered if Than meant to remind him of such things or if it was simply a pleasant addition to the meaning of the gift. 

Either way, his father’s sneer did not phase him as he carried himself back to the ledge overlooking Tartarus and took a seat. He had quite a lot of thinking to do, especially in regards to how he was going to ensure Than understood what that Ambrosia meant. 

-

The next gift of Ambrosia yielded slightly better results, though it was obvious that Thanatos clearly did not understand Zagreus’s intention to its fullest extent. 

“You know Zagreus, one would think with such lavish gifts that you- you’re-” His companion sighed, “Just, if you don’t mean it, stop while you’re ahead.” A flash of green indicated his leaving, but Zagreus did not let himself grow discouraged. 

“You know,” Achilles said, startling him as he turned. “Thanatos is right, Zagreus. It is not one’s place to offer the things you do without… a strong intention.”

Zagreus chuckled, “Why do you think I persist?”

That seemed to stop Achilles in his tracks for just a moment before his mentor cast him an affectionate glance. “I see. In that case, I wish you the best. I think you’ll find that Thanatos is rather smitten with you, himself.” He ruffled Zagreus’s hair, making the godling laugh as the offending limb was pushed away. “You’re a fine lad, and he will be lucky to have received such affection from you.”

Zag smiled sheepishly as he finger-combed his hair back into place. “Yeah, well, that’s even if he wants it. I won’t mind if he doesn’t. After all, I’m a bit of a bad egg around here.”

Achilles chuckled. “Yes, I suppose you are. Though, not many things stop Death from doing as he so pleases, as is seen in the way that he continually… grants you his _assistance_.” Achilles’s smirk was more than enough to make Zagreus blush. 

“He just assists me because he has time. There is nothing more to it than that. But perhaps he has an interest separate from that...” 

“Perhaps, indeed. Regardless, Zagreus, it’s time for me to return to my post before your father reprimands me. Best of luck to you,” Achilles gifts him with a parting smile before returning to his post and simply leaning against the wall as he always did.

Zagreus gave him a final wave as he wandered through the hall and into his room, ready to start a new run. 

-

The next time he saw Thanatos in the house was after several attempts, three of which were technically successful, and two of which were not. He was walking off an immensely painful vanquishing by Asterius, who just so happened to cleave his chest in just the right spot to let him bleed out a little before he died. 

He sighed as he rubbed over the light marking in his skin that was exposed by his attire. Though, when he noticed Than at the balcony, he practically rushed to greet him, soreness that remained from the blood pool entirely forgotten. 

He did not hesitate in beginning this conversation. It was one that he had been waiting to have for longer than he would have liked to admit. “Than, I got this for you,” he procured the Ambrosia bottle from one of his various hidden storages, a small smile on his face. “Before you ask, I do completely understand the implications of this gift. I want you to know that I… I like you.”

Thanatos held the bottle, considering the amber liquid before looking at Zagreus, his expression confused but softened compared to his normally stern expression. “Zagreus, you’re lucky that we have an understanding between each other that is enough for me to know what that means.” There was a beat of silence as he tucked the bottle away, his eyes flicking out to where he’d been looking before. 

Zagreus grinned. “It seems we understand a lot about each other, though I would always be open to learning more.” 

Than’s carefully guarded expression broke slightly as his lips quirked up. “I need to get to work. We may talk later.”

“Wait, Than I-” he was gone in a flash, leaving Zagreus alone to wonder just what Than thought about everything that had just happened. Or even what his response was. 

He sighed, looking to where Thanatos had been looking. “I suppose we’ll just have to do this a few more times, then. Maybe I can pick up another gift as I go.”


End file.
